01 Jan New Year’s Resolutions Aren’t Stupid: Your Guide To Thriving In The New Year

My grandfather used to wear boxers. You know, the underwear.

That was the style in my grandfather’s generation. So, naturally, when my dad grew up several decades later, no one in his generation would be caught dead in boxers. At that point, “jockeys” were in style.

Fast forward another several decades, and jockeys would come to be known as “tighty-whities” — “one of the most stigmatized, maligned articles of clothing a man can own,” according to The Daily Beast. Trust me, tighty-whities are just about the dorkiest thing in the world to millennials. Anyone who’s not completely out touch wears what’s in fashion…boxers.

Notice a pattern?

What does my grandfather’s underwear have to do with fitness?

Nothing…I’m just really bad at starting conversa

Things go in and out of style.

Since we like to think we’re rational creatures, we tend to assume that if most people are for or against an idea, there is a good reason for it. But as Malcolm Gladwell taught us in “The Tipping Point”, ideas don’t always become popular due to their own merit. Far from it.

The truth is, most of us buy into ideas simply because they are already popular.

I didn’t decide that boxers were going to be cool again. None of my friends compared the fabric and elasticity of different underwear styles before deciding which one to go with. Yet you’d be hard-pressed to find a single millennial who doesn’t agree that boxers are good and tighty-whities are bad — simply because that’s what everyone else is saying.

New year’s resolutions are catching a lot of flack at the moment.

My Facebook feed is filled with personal trainers and coaches writing statements like:

“New year’s resolutions are silly and destined to fail. They NEVER last. If you’re REALLY serious about being fit and healthy, why not start December 27th? Why do you have to put it off until January 1st?”

New year’s resolutions aren’t in style anymore, so a lot of fitness professionals are discouraging them, and consequently, people are holding back from making them.

Look, I’m not here to tell you that New Year’s resolutions are good or bad.

… Because they’re neither.

A New Year’s resolution is nothing more than a method. It’s a method for improving oneself.

For some people, it’s an extremely effective method. They get energized by the idea of having a clean slate. They see a fresh start. It’s an entire year that can potentially be filled with growth, development, and success.

And for such a person to not capitalize on this energy because someone said New Year’s resolutions were dumb?

What a waste.

So, this guide is written for anyone who does get excited by the start of a brand new year. It’s for the few who subscribe to the growth mindset (I can always get better) instead of the fixed mindset (my life is the way it is).

The Guide to Making New Year’s Resolutions That Last

Step #1: Decide if you’re in or out.

You need to decide whether you’re going to do this or not. Right now.

One of the most common defense mechanisms we use is avoiding full commitment. Committing 100% to something opens up the possibility that you might try your best and still fail. It makes you vulnerable. And that’s scary.

So we say things like “I’ll give it a shot”, or “I’ll see how it goes”. Anything other than “I’ll do it.”

Failure doesn’t feel as bad when we can rationalize and tell ourselves that we weren’t really trying.

But you know what does feel bad? Looking back on your life and realizing that you didn’t accomplish something because you were too scared to try.

So if you’re continuing with this guide, you’re committing to give it your 100% effort.

Tell yourself out loud that you’re making a New Year’s resolution.

No, really. Do it.

Step #2: Write down your goal and its importance to your life.

Your goal is your destination, and saying “I want to get in shape” is tantamount to jumping in a taxi and telling the driver “take me to east”.

Sure, he may be able to drive you in that general direction; but without an actual address, it won’t be a direct route and neither of you will know when you’ve arrived.

So choose an address. Figure out what you’re working towards.

Do you want to lose fat? Build functional strength? Get off certain meds? Feel healthy and energized?

Whatever your goal is — choose it firmly, and write it down. (Don’t do it later. It’s New Year’s Day.)

Now, and this is the most important part, think about what accomplishing this goal would actually mean to you. Fast forward in your mind to one year from today when you’ve successfully accomplished your goal. Get into that moment.

What will change? What other areas of your life will be affected by achieving your ideal body or health?

Will you be more confident in certain areas? Will you act differently in social settings? Will you have a different relationship with stress, anxiety, and perhaps even yourself?

This part is absolutely essential to making a lasting change this year (or ever). Ask any of our clients — every single one of them has gone through this process prior to starting their fitness programs.

Sure, it requires some deep reflection and it may make you uncomfortable, but without that underlying importance, your goal is nothing more than words on a paper..

Think of this like a kid studying for a science test.

If he memorizes some flashcards, he might able to spit back scientific soundbites on command. He may even do okay on a short-answer quiz.

But do you think he’ll be able to curate that information into a comprehensive essay? Do you think he’ll remember any of it six months from now?

Not likely.

He’ll recite the answers to simple questions, but they’ll be nothing more than words. They don’t have any deeper meaning to him. He hasn’t internalized any of this information. Forget six months from now — two weeks from now he’s likely to forget most of it, as he replaces it with new jargon for the next quiz.

This is what happens when we don’t internalize our goals. If we don’t dig deep and figure out why losing fat or feeling healthy is truly important to us, we’ll quit, or “lose motivation” as soon as things get tough.

Don’t believe me? Try a little experiment. Stop by any gym the first week in January, and do a headcount. The place will be packed. Come back to the same gym at the same time just one month later and do another headcount. Then you’ll understand how gyms make their real profits.

If you don’t internalize your goal today, it will be gone by February 1st. So figure out why it’s important to you, and write it down clearly.

Step #3: Identify your catalyst.

Here’s a terrible New Year’s resolution:

“I’m going to start working out consistently, eating more vegetables, stop drinking alcohol, and avoid junk food.”

These are the kind of resolutions most people make, and (don’t take this the wrong way, but…) they’re literally a waste of time. I’ve yet to see a single resolution like this amount to anything in the long-run.

Why?

There are two huge problems with this resolution:

Problem #1: It’s not specific. 

“Commitments” like working out consistently and eating more vegetables aren’t really commitments. They’re not definable. They almost don’t mean anything.

What is considered “consistently”? When you’re feeling great it might mean every day. When you’re stressed it might mean once a month.

Similar to sort-of committing to a goal, using vague descriptions like “more”, “better”, “less”, etc. are nothing more than defense mechanisms that we use to protect ourselves from the possibility of failure.

But if you can’t fail, you can’t succeed either. So fully commit to a specific goal, like working out Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 6pm immediately after work. That’s a resolution worth making.

Problem #2: It’s too much.

Again, don’t take this the wrong way, but my immediate reaction when I hear a resolution like this is, “Yeah, right.”

It’s not that I don’t want the person to succeed — of course I do. It’s just that I know this isn’t how lifestyle changes work.

We like to categorize everything into binary systems. We’re either Republicans or Democrats. We’re winners or losers. We’re in shape or out of shape.

But we also know that’s not how life actually works. Most people don’t agree with every position of their political parties; no one is born as an inherent winner or loser; and fitness isn’t an all-or-nothing concept.

That’s the problem with trying to go from-zero-to-hero the second the ball drops. If we treat “fitness” as something we’re either doing or not doing, then we’ll go super hardcore for a few weeks, until we inevitably burnout and return to our old habits. It’s a surefire way to accomplish nothing that lasts.

Instead of trying to do everything, ask yourself this:

“What one thing can I do every day that will lead to big results one year from now?”

You’re looking for something simple, something you know you can commit to. A daily habit that may not bring dramatic results in a day or a week, but will have a huge ROI come December.

What you’re looking for here is your catalyst. The positive habit that leads to other positive habits.

A great example is a 10-minute exercise routine every single morning. It’s great, because it passes the magic three questions:

1) Is it sustainable?

Yes. You may not feel like doing it some days, but if your health is a priority to you, you know that you can set aside 10 minutes every day,

2) Is it enough to see results?

Absolutely. The difference between never working out and working out 10 minutes every morning will be dramatic. Take a picture of yourself now and another one 365 workouts from now, and you’ll be shocked by what 10 minutes can achieve.

3) Can it get the ball rolling?

Bingo. This is where the habit’s real return on investment shines through. The 10 minutes you set aside every morning is likely to have a disproportionately positive effect on your results, because it will lead to other positive habits. Habits that you didn’t even try to develop.

When you do a quick 10 minute workout, you’ll feel better physically, and you’ll feel better mentally. Aside from the knowledge that you started off on the right foot each day, you’re releasing a steady stream of endorphins into your brain. You will objectively be happier.

What happens when we’re consistently happier? Aside from becoming more likeable, more productive, and enhancing performance in almost every area of our lives, we no longer feel the urge for the meaningless instant gratification that comes from junk food!

Unhealthy habits — habits that we just can’t seem to break — don’t happen randomly. We use them to fill a void. This isn’t anything new. You already know that you’re more likely to reach for something sugary when you’ve had a bad day. Your mind craves that instant hit of dopamine. So by implementing a simple 10 minute workout routine, you’re also lowering your susceptibility to cravings, and other unhealthy habits.

Step #4: Make it official.

Remember, if you’ve read this far, that means you’re in. You’re committing 100% to a simple and actionable New Year’s resolution, starting today.

Now, let’s be clear. This is something you’re doing for yourself.

It’s not for me, your spouse, or your doctor. It’s not even for Jenny down the street, who never works out but always looks great (hate her).

This is a promise to yourself. The problem is that, if you’re anything like anyone, promises to yourself are the easiest ones to break. That’s why working with a personal trainer or even a friend boosts results so dramatically.

I’m going to give you both.

This isn’t a sale. Part of our mission statement is to help the Baltimore community as a whole. We have a very limited number of clients that we can take on at a time, so we use this blog to provide guidance to more people.

Whether you’re a current Fit2Go client or not, here’s what I want you to do

Comment below with your goal and the one daily habit you’re committing to in the new year, and tag one friend to hold you accountable.

That will give you the accountability factor to ensure you stick with it. Then I’ll go through and reply to your comment with specific feedback and suggestions, to make sure you’re fully prepared to make this resolution happen.

Here’s to your best year yet, Baltimore. Let’s make it happen.